I present to you.....

10,000 chalupas + Unibrow - razor + lazy eye - all apparent hygiene =

FATOLO COLON

Gratuitous Go-Go Quote of the Week

"The only thing I heard about was Santana, Santana, Santana," Gomez said Thursday when reached at his home in the Dominican Republic. "Nothing in the news was said about Gomez, or nothing about the other players traded to the Twins. But I think all us prospects have the tools to play in the big leagues."

Separated At Birth!!!! Kansas City Edtion!

This Week: The Incest City Royals


Manager Trey Hillman/

Magnum P.I. Tom Selleck


Pitcher Doug Waechter/

Keebler Elf



Pitcher Jimmy Gobble/

Television Hero Corky from Life Goes On



Kyle Farnsworth/

Tom Hanks in Philadelphia



Outfielder Coco Crisp/

Flik from A Bug's Life



Alex Gordon/

all time douchebag the Miz


Zack Greinke/

Aaron Carter

Gratuitous Go-Go Quote of the Week

"I don't want to say I can play like Torii, that guy is unbelievable," Gomez said. "I'm just going to be Carlos Gomez. But I think I can play center. I have speed, I like to hustle and I like to slide. I think I play a good center field and hopefully the fans will get to see that."