Deflating the Dome: KuUUUuuuuUUUUuuUUBbbBBBbbBBbBBbEeeeeeSSSssSS

S234, R11S2 4/17/09

Your granddad and me met each other all the way back in 2004, when the heinous George Bush was reigning terror across America (just like your history books have taught you). Our first date took place on April 17th, a Twins game vs the Royals.

While Dave wore his Twins hat and jersey as he would to any game, I decided to wear a "cute" outfit (miniskirt, fashion hat, full makeup etc). It was the last time I would commit such a faux pas.

Five years and many, many (many) Twins games later we were married. The Twins happened to be home on the fifth anniversary of our first date so we circled it on the calendar and planned to attend.

Grandpa had been crabby ALL DAY, and numerous times on the way hinted he didnt want to go to the game at all. Everything from the 'parking hassle' to 'getting up early' to 'simple laziness' was lobbed into the air as possible ways out. I kept telling him I had a feeling that it was going to be the best game ever, and that we should go. Grudgingly, he accepted.

After the first two innings he was asking me if I wanted to leave, but I said "Absolutely not. I would never leave a game early for I am a real fan." However, as the game went on his demands to leave became more intense. At one point he grabbed my wrist and attempted to force me from my seat. I told him to "MAN UP" and said if he wanted to leave he better find a bus schedule.

With the Angels leading 8-4 heading to the top of the eighth, and Matt Guerrier on to "pitch," Dave demanded to leave. He grabbed his jacket, and stood at the bottom of the section waiting for me to get up and go.

You see, he had been to the previous two nights games- both blowouts due to the insanely inept 09 bullpen -and had seen enough. When Guerrier threw a wild pitch, then gave up a sac fly to mortal enemy Torii Hunter Dave reached a fever pitch and was BOOing wildly.

I marched down to the bottom of the stairs, leaving my purse and jacket in my seat. When I got to the bottom of the stairs I slapped your grandpa right in his blasphemous face, drawing blood. With a look of anger and sadness consuming his face he moped back to his seat and began to sob. "You will thank me later," I said.

Then, as I knew it would, it began. Cuddy with a walk and a steal of second. Crede walked. Redmond SMOKED a single over Kendry Morales' head at first for an RBI.

9-5, One out.

With Jose Morales (no relation) running for Red Dog, Punto walked in a great AB, loading the bases for Denard Span. De-Nard Dogg slapped a double through the right-center field gap, scoring two.

9-7, One out.

Punto on third, Span on second. Only one out. At this point I woke up your Grandpa who had fallen asleep long ago. He awoke in time to see B Harris strikeout looking, and was not happy for being woken up for nothing. "Brendan Harris?! Really?!," he said grumpily.

9-7 Two out.

"But Justin Morneau is up next! So obviously he will get a hit!" I exclaimed. Grandpa shot me down quickly: "They will just walk him. Now let me sleep." I rolled my eyes and clapped loudly to wake him up.

Well, they did walk Morneau, the go ahead run, to face Jason Kubel. Kubel was 3-4 at this point, with a single, double and triple. He took a first pitch curveball, then.....